“You look like a nice young man,” she tells me. “I make matches for people so I know what I’m doing. My daughter though … Well she is taking too long to find herself a husband so now I’m matching for her. Would you like to see her picture?”
Before I can answer she shows me her phone. The daughter is actually kind of cute.
“Meet her and I guarantee you at least 30 years of happy marriage!”
“That’s quite a promise!”
“I can tell these things,” she continues. “I make matches for people. But her? Maybe I should be showing her picture to other girls! They can marry each other now!”
“I don’t know. Will I have 30 years with a crazy mother in law?”
“Sense of humor! Thats good!!!”
Just then her husband comes back from paying the bill and screams at her: “You’re bothering HIM now? Will you please leave people alone?!!!”
So she turns to him: “Why don’t you leave ME alone? All I want is for our daughter to have a happy marriage like us!!!”
Then she follows him as he storms away … So I didn’t get the girl’s number …
In the moment I thought my “crazy” characterization fit. Is it wise to proposition random strangers like this? Then my diagnosis shifted to an anxious desperation. Although her method may be questionable, I could tell she genuinely loved her daughter and truly worried that she would forever be alone and miserable.
But the more I thought about it, her seeming anxiety was masking an innate confidence that she would be successful in her search for a son-in-law. Her boldness was not rooted in fear but in a supreme trust in the universe her persistence would manifest a miracle.
I think that in her mind she was motivated by the powerful belief that there MUST be someone out there for her daughter. I do not know if this is truly the case or not. What I admire here is the depth of her conviction, that she would risk seeming like a fool without worry of embarrassment.
#dailypossible challenge: If chatting up strangers in your daily travels is not your typical thing, try it out today. Start a conversation about anything, the topic or result is not as important as the exercise itself. If you need more of a challenge, stretch yourself and connect on a deeper level. It doesn’t have to be as serious as a marriage proposal. But if I run into that cute daughter of hers (without her mother), I intend to at least get her number.
Please share your experience in the comments.
Photo: Britt-Marie Sohlstrom/Flickr